It’s time for some honesty. Not that I haven’t been honest in the past, but today I’m going to be more… shall we say, “brutally” honest. (That sounds way more dramatic than this post will probably end up being. 😆)
So, I’ve been a bit depressed lately. Lately, as in, on and off for the past month or two and that’s why I haven’t posted anything for the past several weeks. *sigh* Trust me, I tried, but when you’re brain says, “hey, let’s be sad and moody and tired” it’s hard to type out something that doesn’t sound really scattered.
Why am I telling you this? Well, because I want to be honest. I don’t want to hide behind smiles and words that are meaningless. And because I made a painting… and I’m kind of leading up to that.
You see, we all wear masks.
“Okay, Chalice,” you say, “It’s 2020, if ya know what I mean. Of course we all wear masks….”
Not that kind of mask. (Think “Masqueraaaaaade!”)
What I’m trying to say is we all try to cover up who we really are. It’s especially easy on the internet and on social media, to pretend to be someone that you’re not. It’s so easy to put on a front that makes it look like you’re having the best day of your life, when you’re actually feeling alone and empty. You can post a Bible verse every day and people will think you really have it together, when the truth is you’re really struggling and you have so many questions that no one can seem to answer.
I’m just tired of fake. I’m tired of the masks.
The world tried to tell us how strong we are in keeping our masks on. How it takes true strength to smile when you’re sad. To laugh when you’re depressed. And I’m not saying there isn’t some truth to that.
But we’ve got to be honest first. We have to be able to admit that we’re not okay. We have to acknowledge that we can’t fix our own brokenness with fake smiles and laughter. We have to admit that we really need someone to save us.
It isn’t easy to take off our masks. It isn’t easy to lay aside our pride and show the world who we really are. It takes a lot of strength and humility to be honest about our struggles, and I’m still trying to figure out how to go about doing this. Honestly… I don’t have all the answers. But do know this: there’s freedom that comes in honesty…. in admitting our weakness (2 Chronicles 12:9). There’s freedom in being okay with who we are. And being okay with the fact that we’re growing.
I wish I could be able to just sit down and think things through, and maybe if I thought hard and long enough I could suddenly figure everything out. but that’s just not how life works. It’s a slow growing process. It’s not sitting down at a desk and puzzling everything out. It’s sitting down with our Heavenly Father and trusting in Him, even when we can’t make sense of what we’re going through.
So, that’s what this picture is about. It’s about messy honesty, and flaws, and acceptance, and freedom, and joy. It’s about taking off the masks we’ve made for ourselves and being the unique person God created us to be. And it’s about all the other things I’m not sure how to put into words.
On a lighter, more technical note, I had so much fun exploring a different style in this painting. I usually only use one brush (the round one) because I’m not quite comfortable with the texture brushes. I brought them all out for this piece, though, and just had a blast! I hope you guys like it. If not, that’s okay. This painting isn’t for everyone. (My brother confirmed that last night. 😂 Love you, Gucci! 😉)
Love to you all! Stay lionhearted. 😊💛💛